I became a spinster almost 9 years ago when I surpassed the accepted "marriageable" age of 26. I became aware of my spinsterhood when I turned 30. I became acutely aware of it last year when my girlfriends started some sort of fertility pandemic and all became pregnant with their thirds. Uh, not to imply that babies are an infectious disease.I'm unofficially in my mid-thirties. In fact, I filled out an online form earlier this week for something-or-other and it truncated my selected age to the "late thirties" category. I think that's really harsh - I'm two months away from 35 and I hardly think it's fair to apply "34" to "late-thirties" but whatever.
Last week I visited one of my married girlfriends for the day. Actually, all but two of my girlfriends are married. And all but one of the marrieds have kids; the one that doesn't has two dogs, three cats, a bird and a very immature husband so we can really lump her in with the rest. So my girlfriend (who lives in a beautiful house on the lake) said she really envies how free I am. I keep hearing this. I don't get it. I saw no dungeon there. No chains. No gates keeping her in. What's the deal?
She misses being single. She misses taking off for the weekend with friends. Misses not having to make arrangements with babysitters, dog sitters, house sitters, etc. to be free and 'experience life' and stuff. But the thing is...I don't do that, either. My last spontaneous weekend road trip was in 2007. My last FUN weekend road trip was in 2006.
It got me thinking about how little marrieds know about singles. Or, at least how little my friends know about me. If she only knew how monotonous yet stressful my life is, she'd be thankful for her ball-and-chain (plus, her husband is adorable and super-sweet to her). And then it hit me: I realized she's not at all envious, she's "reverse-sour-graping" me! My spinstery life, my situation, makes her uncomfortable and she doesn't want to make me feel bad, so she makes her situation pale in comparison to my {{allegedly}} vibrant, swinging single life.
I thought if I actually detailed to my friends what my day-to-day routine (or rut, really) looks like, I'd lose 'em all! They'd be so disenchanted. Tuesday I watched 8 consecutive episodes of Law & Order SVU, then I baked a potato, made a cocktail and watched MORE TV. Not because I'm "free" or because I'm "so lucky" to have "so much time" but because I'm lazy, I'm in-between jobs and it was so much more appealing than sending out more résumés. There isn't anyone around (not even family) to keep me in check and it's not like my phone is ringing off the hook with potential employers or suitors these days.
But, yes, I am free to hop in the car and take a road trip this weekend. All by myself. With little money and no destination.
